i can't seem to remember important things like to call and make an appt for my eldest with plastic surgeon to have stitches checked, so i don't know why i think i would remember when the rest of the baby weight melted away. but, i'm 6.5 weeks post-partum and i'm more than ready for it to bid 'adieu'. the mundane details of life - i think i have this written somewhere in my pregnancy weight journal but can't manage to find that in all the boxes...i do know last time it was gone by the time i headed to italia with swanky and he was 3.5 months. i don't think i can wait that long. but, i figure i need to focus on getting enough sleep and that will help enable the process. speaking of, it's 12.21 am and i should get on that since we are trying to get LC to drop the 3am feed which means he's up at 6.30 am (he's already failed once after a week of trying).
swanky is giving us a hard time - he's all or nothing. adorable or horrible. wants to hug & kiss you or bite you. terrible 2's.
had my first solo dinner with my hubby post-bebe at bar bambino which was fabulous. can't say all the cheese i ate will be helping that weight 'melt away'. love that when i got home my 4.5 yr old asked 'how was your dinner?' like he was genuiney interested and then, asked me what i ate. so mature and such the child of a foodie.
off to bed - allergies are killing me...
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Saturday, March 22, 2008
adorable or horrible?
adorable or horrible? that is the question to be...swanky is roaring into the terrible 2's and making the best/worst of it. if he's not horrible, frankly, he's adorable, but when he's bad, he's very, very bad. honestly, it scares me how i will ever make it out the house solo with all 3 boys with the behavior he's been exhibiting as of late.
Saturday, March 15, 2008
mary poppins by way of jamaica
well, i've been slacking the last 10 days, and therefore, no posts. part of the reason was mary poppins (of jamaica) showed up on the 7th, 2 days after my last entry. and, because i've been getting so lazy since the 5th, that i don't get out of bed for the night feedings any more and just pull the peewee into my bed. so, alas, no midnight entries in the blog.
why i didn't figure out this baby nurse thing earlier is a mystery to me? actually, that's a lie as i know part of the reason is because i breastfeed (so i figured i'd have to get up anyway) and the other reason was it would really drain the bank account. but, it really is sweet relief. so, i saved up all my credits and cashed in for one the last go-round and, boy, i am already dreading her departure (which isn't for a month). since i have all c-sections, we have to have round-the-clock help anyway to pick up the swanky-do. on my 2nd section, i tried picking up powell early and it took way longer to heal, more bleeding, etc. it just wasn't worth it. so, i've learned. so, it's nice to have someone here, so E. doesn't have to rush home from work, and he can go on biz trips (preferably kept to a minimum as it's still 3 kids under 4.5). she takes care of the baby and helps with the kids. but, the biggest coup de grace by far is she gets up for the 3am feed and feeds him pumped breastmilk (from earlier in the day), so i get to sleep for roughly 6 hours! the other day it was even 8 hrs, but we've regressed last 2 nights which is hopefully a growth spurt. i feel like a semi-normal person - except that i breastfeed all day long. can't wait to get on the 4 feedings/day every 4 hours as that's way more manageable. i know why people quit breasfeeding so early; it's a pain in the butt to work into your daily routine amongst other issues. yesterday, i had to breastfeed at the plastic surgeon (P. getting his stitches from monday checked on), and was scheduled to do so at susan at the lanvin trunk show and called to change my appointment because i was NOT about to do that.
great news was we found out yesterday LC's carnitine level had improved with the meds which is a positive indicator he does NOT have the disease. YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! i'm really psyched. small bad news is i have low carnitine, but i made it this far, so how bad can it be? kara said it could just be low because i was preggers and your carnitine gets depleted. i had to get more blood drawn yesterday and again, in the future. if it continues to be low, they will do an echocardiogram to make sure my heart's ok. and, they said it could be something to watch if i got prego again, but i assured her that was not the case. overall, i'm elated about LC.
swanky is rounding into the terrible 2's at 20.5 months. he's throwing food/toys on the floor if he doesn't get his way, and/or banging head on floor and tantrums. nice. but, he's really funny when he dances (we gotta get this on video) and when he wants to kiss baby on head all the time (a little too much and open mouth kiss where he leaves a lot of spit and/or food residue).
powell was on playdate with nick silva monday and fell on the bus and got stitches. he was so brave and didn't even cry. dr friedenthal (mom pulled out all the stops to get him in plastic surgeon so LC didn't have to sit in ER waiting room and chance getting sick) did 4 internal stitches and dermabond glue on the outside. he did a show n tell about it thursday at school.
maybe we can actually try to unpack more as i feel we're at standstill and/or straighten house. E. goes to monterey for 3 day conference tomorrow.
why i didn't figure out this baby nurse thing earlier is a mystery to me? actually, that's a lie as i know part of the reason is because i breastfeed (so i figured i'd have to get up anyway) and the other reason was it would really drain the bank account. but, it really is sweet relief. so, i saved up all my credits and cashed in for one the last go-round and, boy, i am already dreading her departure (which isn't for a month). since i have all c-sections, we have to have round-the-clock help anyway to pick up the swanky-do. on my 2nd section, i tried picking up powell early and it took way longer to heal, more bleeding, etc. it just wasn't worth it. so, i've learned. so, it's nice to have someone here, so E. doesn't have to rush home from work, and he can go on biz trips (preferably kept to a minimum as it's still 3 kids under 4.5). she takes care of the baby and helps with the kids. but, the biggest coup de grace by far is she gets up for the 3am feed and feeds him pumped breastmilk (from earlier in the day), so i get to sleep for roughly 6 hours! the other day it was even 8 hrs, but we've regressed last 2 nights which is hopefully a growth spurt. i feel like a semi-normal person - except that i breastfeed all day long. can't wait to get on the 4 feedings/day every 4 hours as that's way more manageable. i know why people quit breasfeeding so early; it's a pain in the butt to work into your daily routine amongst other issues. yesterday, i had to breastfeed at the plastic surgeon (P. getting his stitches from monday checked on), and was scheduled to do so at susan at the lanvin trunk show and called to change my appointment because i was NOT about to do that.
great news was we found out yesterday LC's carnitine level had improved with the meds which is a positive indicator he does NOT have the disease. YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! i'm really psyched. small bad news is i have low carnitine, but i made it this far, so how bad can it be? kara said it could just be low because i was preggers and your carnitine gets depleted. i had to get more blood drawn yesterday and again, in the future. if it continues to be low, they will do an echocardiogram to make sure my heart's ok. and, they said it could be something to watch if i got prego again, but i assured her that was not the case. overall, i'm elated about LC.
swanky is rounding into the terrible 2's at 20.5 months. he's throwing food/toys on the floor if he doesn't get his way, and/or banging head on floor and tantrums. nice. but, he's really funny when he dances (we gotta get this on video) and when he wants to kiss baby on head all the time (a little too much and open mouth kiss where he leaves a lot of spit and/or food residue).
powell was on playdate with nick silva monday and fell on the bus and got stitches. he was so brave and didn't even cry. dr friedenthal (mom pulled out all the stops to get him in plastic surgeon so LC didn't have to sit in ER waiting room and chance getting sick) did 4 internal stitches and dermabond glue on the outside. he did a show n tell about it thursday at school.
maybe we can actually try to unpack more as i feel we're at standstill and/or straighten house. E. goes to monterey for 3 day conference tomorrow.
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
boys update
LC had his first bath last night and loved it. he was wailing when we woke him up and took his clothes off. then, when we put him in, he was totally quiet from raging. his oldest brother predicted it - maybe he'll be a water baby like P. swanky hated it.
swanky's a hot dancer and does the white man shoulder shake and throws in a clap and a few steps. i'm hoping he didn't get shoulder shake from me but he might have. did great tonight to ben harper covering sexual healing.
P. is currently obsessed with making paper airplanes. was allowed no treats today after lying to us about the sitter giving him a bath yesterday.
today LC & i go to get carnitine levels tested - ugh.
mable, baby nurse, comes friday - yeah! about to experience the good life and better luck hopefully. night.
swanky's a hot dancer and does the white man shoulder shake and throws in a clap and a few steps. i'm hoping he didn't get shoulder shake from me but he might have. did great tonight to ben harper covering sexual healing.
P. is currently obsessed with making paper airplanes. was allowed no treats today after lying to us about the sitter giving him a bath yesterday.
today LC & i go to get carnitine levels tested - ugh.
mable, baby nurse, comes friday - yeah! about to experience the good life and better luck hopefully. night.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
i couldn't make this shit up if i tried...
ok...my life (as of recent) is a real 'as the world turns'. first off, i will start with LC's metabolic disease, carnitine transport deficiency, which his pediatrician called me tuesday (a week ago) to confirm that he has. the doctor did say there was a very TINY chance he might not have it, but they were fairly certain he did. the good news is he could basically live a normal life but he would have to take medicine starting now (he was 2 weeks old last tuesday) for the rest of his life. the complications (if disease is untreated) are very serious - sudden death for infants, cardirespiratory attack, and the majority are heart problems. let's say they are serious enough that the other boys need to be tested, and even if they don't have it, they need to be tested to determine if they are genetic carriers. dr. brock (who is a totally chill, laid-back guy) said he wanted me to make an appt with the genetic specialists at ucsf even though they did not feel it was imperative since he does not know much about this rare disease. he said we needed to have strategies in place for when he's sick, etc. etc. now, he's such a 'everything's fine!" type of dr. that if he said go talk to the specialists, i'm there. he gives me their number; i call for 2 days and leave voicemails (they are predominantly research scientists) and get no call back. friday i call my doc's office for help getting in touch. the genetic counselor, kara, ends up calling me from ucsf metabolics clinic and, after a roundabout discussion of about 20 minutes, determines MY doctor had a game of 'telephone' going and misunderstood. they think it is highly UNlikely LC has the disease as he doesn't have any of the very serious seconday symptoms (i.e. cardio myopathy, renal and liver issues, etc) are you KIDDING me? i share the good news with E and family and can't leave doc voicemail til monday.
E's sister takes the 2 older boys for sleepover saturday morning so we can work on unpacking - so nice of her. we unpack all day long and move things up from storage. i get a wild hare and we even go out to dinner with LC at terzo. look out! friday night we slept horribly as LC was up every 1.5 either wanting to eat or crying. we decide it's time to whip out the bottle topper saturday night as we are desperadoes. so, we do and we get an extra hour of sleep - 3 instead of 2. i'm thinking 'this is the good life'. he wakes up screaming to eat at 2.15. i pull him into bed and start feeding him and doze off for about 8 minutes. i look up at the clock and i hear something fall in our flat downstairs. i think 'maybe i'm imagining this and something was precariously perched', so i listen... i hear something else and i know i'm not wrong. i know someone is in our house. just thinking back to how i felt shortens my breath and causes my heart to start racing. i wake E who would sleep through a freight train (and honestly i would have as well one of these newborn nights when i'm short on sleep) and tell him ' wake up - someone is definitely downstairs in our house.' i have visions of homeless rummaging through our stuff - not as nefarious as it could possibly be. he goes to walk out and i point out he might want to put boxers on. he walks out our bedroom door to the top of stairs, then all-too-quickly, returns and confirms my worst fears. "SOMEONE IS DEFINITELY HERE - CALL 911." thank god he had installed a phone next to me in bed (even though i didn't really want it there). i am on the phone with 911 operator giving them all of our info. he tells me my husband shouldn't have gone downstairs i'm like ' it's too F---NG late for that!' this whole time i'm breastfeeding the little guy. then, i hear E. yell at them 'WHERE ARE YOU GOING?' i freak out and think they are trying to run away from him i.e. upstairs to where we are. i'm telling the dispatcher i think they are coming upstairs 'should i hide in the closet?" he says 'yes' and 'lock yourself in". i tell him there's no F--NG doorknobs in the house yet. i'm ineffectively trying to hide between the clothes. next thing i know he tells me the police are in the house and it should be ok to go down. turns out there was a man & woman climbing out hall bath window when E went down; he ran to front of house to see them, then went to back and saw them hopping fence (when he yelled to them). the guy said "dude, i was just looking for my house". the cops told us they say this in case they go to court they claim they were drunk & mistakenly went into wrong house. they whisk E off to try to ID couple matching description around block who are being detained in cuffs. E said they totally matched description but it wasn't them. E said the guy in cuffs was loaded doing perp walk - what a buzzkill that would be. 10 SF cops chasing them and they escape. they call CSI to come in to print the next day. i'm envisioning emily procter in her tight pants and fitted button-down with blonde hair swinging in wind. instead, we got super-nice bulldyke with horrid short mullet-cut, full brace and plus 65 lbs in all the wrong places who gave us some fascinating insights into crime life. she printed and couldn't get anything to convict; this is not the CSI you see on tv but we all figured that. no enormous budgets for every hi-tech gizmo to catch the bad guys (esp in SF with our super-low conviction rate).
we have trouble getting back to sleep that night - needless to say, we are tired in the morning. we try to keep it under wraps from the boys to not scare them. i would have had a heart attack if they were down there and i knew someone else was, too. got the alarm co in the next day but haven't hooked anything up yet.
i feel like a main character in my own soap opera - hit & run 2 weeks before due date, move, move into hotel, someone slashes porsche roof on nob hill, birth, move back to hotel, on and off again genetic-disease, company financing limbo, move back into house that's partially done, and now this. i need a valium just listening to it but, surprisingly, don't feel like i'll lose it just yet. the lack of sleep must have me numb to a certain point.
E's sister takes the 2 older boys for sleepover saturday morning so we can work on unpacking - so nice of her. we unpack all day long and move things up from storage. i get a wild hare and we even go out to dinner with LC at terzo. look out! friday night we slept horribly as LC was up every 1.5 either wanting to eat or crying. we decide it's time to whip out the bottle topper saturday night as we are desperadoes. so, we do and we get an extra hour of sleep - 3 instead of 2. i'm thinking 'this is the good life'. he wakes up screaming to eat at 2.15. i pull him into bed and start feeding him and doze off for about 8 minutes. i look up at the clock and i hear something fall in our flat downstairs. i think 'maybe i'm imagining this and something was precariously perched', so i listen... i hear something else and i know i'm not wrong. i know someone is in our house. just thinking back to how i felt shortens my breath and causes my heart to start racing. i wake E who would sleep through a freight train (and honestly i would have as well one of these newborn nights when i'm short on sleep) and tell him ' wake up - someone is definitely downstairs in our house.' i have visions of homeless rummaging through our stuff - not as nefarious as it could possibly be. he goes to walk out and i point out he might want to put boxers on. he walks out our bedroom door to the top of stairs, then all-too-quickly, returns and confirms my worst fears. "SOMEONE IS DEFINITELY HERE - CALL 911." thank god he had installed a phone next to me in bed (even though i didn't really want it there). i am on the phone with 911 operator giving them all of our info. he tells me my husband shouldn't have gone downstairs i'm like ' it's too F---NG late for that!' this whole time i'm breastfeeding the little guy. then, i hear E. yell at them 'WHERE ARE YOU GOING?' i freak out and think they are trying to run away from him i.e. upstairs to where we are. i'm telling the dispatcher i think they are coming upstairs 'should i hide in the closet?" he says 'yes' and 'lock yourself in". i tell him there's no F--NG doorknobs in the house yet. i'm ineffectively trying to hide between the clothes. next thing i know he tells me the police are in the house and it should be ok to go down. turns out there was a man & woman climbing out hall bath window when E went down; he ran to front of house to see them, then went to back and saw them hopping fence (when he yelled to them). the guy said "dude, i was just looking for my house". the cops told us they say this in case they go to court they claim they were drunk & mistakenly went into wrong house. they whisk E off to try to ID couple matching description around block who are being detained in cuffs. E said they totally matched description but it wasn't them. E said the guy in cuffs was loaded doing perp walk - what a buzzkill that would be. 10 SF cops chasing them and they escape. they call CSI to come in to print the next day. i'm envisioning emily procter in her tight pants and fitted button-down with blonde hair swinging in wind. instead, we got super-nice bulldyke with horrid short mullet-cut, full brace and plus 65 lbs in all the wrong places who gave us some fascinating insights into crime life. she printed and couldn't get anything to convict; this is not the CSI you see on tv but we all figured that. no enormous budgets for every hi-tech gizmo to catch the bad guys (esp in SF with our super-low conviction rate).
we have trouble getting back to sleep that night - needless to say, we are tired in the morning. we try to keep it under wraps from the boys to not scare them. i would have had a heart attack if they were down there and i knew someone else was, too. got the alarm co in the next day but haven't hooked anything up yet.
i feel like a main character in my own soap opera - hit & run 2 weeks before due date, move, move into hotel, someone slashes porsche roof on nob hill, birth, move back to hotel, on and off again genetic-disease, company financing limbo, move back into house that's partially done, and now this. i need a valium just listening to it but, surprisingly, don't feel like i'll lose it just yet. the lack of sleep must have me numb to a certain point.
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